Hello everyone! It has been a very long time since the last time that I updated anyone on anything here. Sad but true. In the past year I have dealt with death, missed opportunities, injuries, and major changes all around. So, let's have a recap in chronological order just to get my mind straight.
I may have mentioned it before, I don't remember, but my great aunt had an accident and she was in the hospital for a long time. When they finally deemed her well enough to leave, they brought her to a center instead so that she would receive better care. While it was a good thing because I could see her more often, unlike if she was in Corona, I don't think it was such a great idea to leave her care to strangers. Her son works in the hospital, her daughter-in-law works in a hospital, why couldn't they find a way for family to be the one to take care of her. But no, she was left in the center for months before they finally took her home. It was sad because after her accident, she couldn't even recognize me anymore. She didn't know who I was, my name, or how I was related to her. It was such a complete change from what I remember of her that I didn't really know how to handle it. And then she was leaving for the Philippines in July. I didn't even get to say goodbye to her properly. I just knew she was leaving. And now she's gone. She passed away in the Philippines earlier this year and my last memories of her are of her lying in bed unable to recognize me or have a conversation with her. She took care of me as a child. She used to just be in the apartment across the yard and now she's gone. I miss you Apu. I will always love you.
During all this, my grandma was going through therapy after her own hospital scare. She had gone through her -apparently- second surgery on her head. Not just her head but her brain. They had found a tumor, that was the largest the doctor had ever seen, near(?) her brain, Thankfully, despite its size, it was not cancerous. She has slowly been recovering but its been slow in the making because she refuses to cooperate. Rather than exercise her arm while she's home, she will just watch tv, snack, and sleep all day. She used to be so active, hell, she was more active than me. I think part of it is that she lives in Anaheim Hills now. Ever since they moved there my grandma doesn't get to go out and walk to the market or liquor store anymore. How could she when they don't have the things she wants at the market. They don't have fresh baguettes from the Asian bakery. They don't have her favorite lotto scratchers at the liquor store. They live up on a hill, how is she supposed to walk up and down that hill on her own. She can't even walk the dog because he's so energetic and would just overpower her. I haven't seen her in a while but I hope she's doing better.
Last August 30, 2014 my dad passed away in his sleep due to a heart attack. It came as a complete shock to us all because he showed no signs of illness. Sure, he had been having trouble sleeping lately but that was nothing new because he always did have a problem sleeping. I remember waking up that morning at 7 and just looking out to the kitchen, my room is right next to it with a glass sliding door, wondering where my dad was and why wasn't he in the kitchen. For so long he would be up before me watching Supernatural while eating breakfast. After just sitting there I went back to sleep, it was a Saturday and I was still in summer mode, the semester had just started that previous week. An hour later I was woken up by my mom screaming for help because my dad wasn't waking up. I ran for it. My mom has a tendency to overreact. I was hoping this was just one of those cases. But no. He really wasn't. I ran outside yelling for our neighbor, who is a family friend, to help us while my mom called my aunts and an ambulance. I was told to wait outside for the paramedics to show them where to go. They had us wait in the kitchen rather than see what they were doing to my dad. Eventually they brought him out to the ambulance and my mom told me to go with them. When we got to Garden Grove Hospital my aunt and cousin were already there. I didn't know what to do. All I could think about was that my dad wasn't waking up and we couldn't do anything to help him. Eventually my mom came with the police. By now more of my relatives had arrived. My dad was announced dead after several attempts, apparently more than they usually do, to revive him. We had to call my cousin JR and tell him to bring our grandma but not to let her know where they were going or why. We had to call my cousin Ivan to pick up my brother and not to tell him our dad was gone. I had to call my aunt in San Francisco to let them know that my dad was gone. I had to stay strong. My mom was breaking down. We were all crying but I had to be strong. I knew it would only get worse once my grandma got there and I still had to tell my brother. It was unfair. At the time, I was the youngest person from our family at the hospital but I was supposed to update everyone on what happened. And then my uncle comes and has the nerve to ask if there was foul play. Who is supposed to commit foul play that would cause my dad's death other than the people he was last with, which was us. It was so offensive and he said that right in front of everyone without caring. Yes, he lost his brother but we all lost my dad so it was not okay for him to just accuse of foul play. For the first time in a long time, the family was actually together. And it took my dad dying for it to happen.
It's been over a year and things have not gotten any easier. Hell, I'm crying now just reliving the events in my head. I have a job now at JCPenney. I had to if I wanted to help my mom even if its just by paying for my own things. I drive now too. I might not be going far but at least I'm going.
Goodnight for now. Hopefully with this new laptop I'll be posting more even if no one reads it.
I may have mentioned it before, I don't remember, but my great aunt had an accident and she was in the hospital for a long time. When they finally deemed her well enough to leave, they brought her to a center instead so that she would receive better care. While it was a good thing because I could see her more often, unlike if she was in Corona, I don't think it was such a great idea to leave her care to strangers. Her son works in the hospital, her daughter-in-law works in a hospital, why couldn't they find a way for family to be the one to take care of her. But no, she was left in the center for months before they finally took her home. It was sad because after her accident, she couldn't even recognize me anymore. She didn't know who I was, my name, or how I was related to her. It was such a complete change from what I remember of her that I didn't really know how to handle it. And then she was leaving for the Philippines in July. I didn't even get to say goodbye to her properly. I just knew she was leaving. And now she's gone. She passed away in the Philippines earlier this year and my last memories of her are of her lying in bed unable to recognize me or have a conversation with her. She took care of me as a child. She used to just be in the apartment across the yard and now she's gone. I miss you Apu. I will always love you.
During all this, my grandma was going through therapy after her own hospital scare. She had gone through her -apparently- second surgery on her head. Not just her head but her brain. They had found a tumor, that was the largest the doctor had ever seen, near(?) her brain, Thankfully, despite its size, it was not cancerous. She has slowly been recovering but its been slow in the making because she refuses to cooperate. Rather than exercise her arm while she's home, she will just watch tv, snack, and sleep all day. She used to be so active, hell, she was more active than me. I think part of it is that she lives in Anaheim Hills now. Ever since they moved there my grandma doesn't get to go out and walk to the market or liquor store anymore. How could she when they don't have the things she wants at the market. They don't have fresh baguettes from the Asian bakery. They don't have her favorite lotto scratchers at the liquor store. They live up on a hill, how is she supposed to walk up and down that hill on her own. She can't even walk the dog because he's so energetic and would just overpower her. I haven't seen her in a while but I hope she's doing better.
Last August 30, 2014 my dad passed away in his sleep due to a heart attack. It came as a complete shock to us all because he showed no signs of illness. Sure, he had been having trouble sleeping lately but that was nothing new because he always did have a problem sleeping. I remember waking up that morning at 7 and just looking out to the kitchen, my room is right next to it with a glass sliding door, wondering where my dad was and why wasn't he in the kitchen. For so long he would be up before me watching Supernatural while eating breakfast. After just sitting there I went back to sleep, it was a Saturday and I was still in summer mode, the semester had just started that previous week. An hour later I was woken up by my mom screaming for help because my dad wasn't waking up. I ran for it. My mom has a tendency to overreact. I was hoping this was just one of those cases. But no. He really wasn't. I ran outside yelling for our neighbor, who is a family friend, to help us while my mom called my aunts and an ambulance. I was told to wait outside for the paramedics to show them where to go. They had us wait in the kitchen rather than see what they were doing to my dad. Eventually they brought him out to the ambulance and my mom told me to go with them. When we got to Garden Grove Hospital my aunt and cousin were already there. I didn't know what to do. All I could think about was that my dad wasn't waking up and we couldn't do anything to help him. Eventually my mom came with the police. By now more of my relatives had arrived. My dad was announced dead after several attempts, apparently more than they usually do, to revive him. We had to call my cousin JR and tell him to bring our grandma but not to let her know where they were going or why. We had to call my cousin Ivan to pick up my brother and not to tell him our dad was gone. I had to call my aunt in San Francisco to let them know that my dad was gone. I had to stay strong. My mom was breaking down. We were all crying but I had to be strong. I knew it would only get worse once my grandma got there and I still had to tell my brother. It was unfair. At the time, I was the youngest person from our family at the hospital but I was supposed to update everyone on what happened. And then my uncle comes and has the nerve to ask if there was foul play. Who is supposed to commit foul play that would cause my dad's death other than the people he was last with, which was us. It was so offensive and he said that right in front of everyone without caring. Yes, he lost his brother but we all lost my dad so it was not okay for him to just accuse of foul play. For the first time in a long time, the family was actually together. And it took my dad dying for it to happen.
It's been over a year and things have not gotten any easier. Hell, I'm crying now just reliving the events in my head. I have a job now at JCPenney. I had to if I wanted to help my mom even if its just by paying for my own things. I drive now too. I might not be going far but at least I'm going.
Goodnight for now. Hopefully with this new laptop I'll be posting more even if no one reads it.
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